A Better Update!

(Age 4 1/2: S.E. Library's Spring Party, 2001)

I now see my last entry was a “downer”. Sorry about that! I’ll be more upbeat today! I always try; however, sometimes anguish takes over I guess. (In addition to the “breakfast cereal” I had been reading the CT Scholarship applications from the Heidelberg students and discussing those with the other committee members. They’ve been very touching and many of them moved me to tears. I think that’s also made me very emotional in recent days.)

Because Shayla had experienced great success with her vision therapy (moving up five levels in her class in reading and now reading at end of second grade reading level) and because she had become very worried about not being ready to make her first Holy communion (because vision therapy and CCD classes were on the same evening) I decided to discontinue her vision therapy. Her testing in Toledo showed that everything was corrected so instead of continuing for the remaining five weeks we stopped and now she is back to going to CCD. She’s really happy about her eyes being “fixed” and she likes being a top reader in her class. Shayne and I marvel at the incredible progress she made this year! She is a hard worker and quite delightful. It’s amazing how much I did not know about her, until Christi died. Her compassion is unbelievable which I think is most likely attributed to living in and out of Ronald McDonald Houses and being concerned about Christi for four of her seven years of life.

While Christi was dying in the hospital, I couldn’t leave her side. I sat in her bed with my computer and ordered her “going to Heaven” dress from Ebay so that she would have something pretty to be buried in. I couldn’t believe how inexpensive a new dress from California was (about $50 which included shipping). At that point in time, I decided that we would not let Mrs. Wagner sew Shayla’s Holy Communion dress as she had offered and as she had done for Christi because I knew that it would cost more than $50 to make a new one, not to mention the countless hours Carla would pour into it.

A few weeks ago Shayla and I went back to Ebay and together we located this beautiful new dress with tags. I think she’ll look lovely as she makes this special Sacrament in church in a few weeks. Last night Carla called and said that she wanted to add beads or something to Christi’s veil so that she could sew something special for Shayla too. I admitted to Carla that the veil was actually pretty wrinkly and that it could use some work so last night we dropped it off at her home to put her loving touches on it. (In getting everything ready for Shayla, I could hardly believe how tiny Christi was when she made her first Holy Communion three years ago. The dress is simply gorgeous and I shall forever treasure it.) If she would have been able to fit in it I would have had her buried in that dress, but 2 ½ years later that wasn’t even a consideration.

Here’s wishing you and yours a fabulous weekend!

If Christi were alive, she'd never permit me to share a picture of her in her panties, but now I think it's ok. I snapped this one afternoon at the Ronald House when she put on an impromptu dance show for us. What a hoot!
This is how I want to remember Christi - joking around with Shayla (CHOP, June 2005)