Support For Christi Thomas

This blog is to help offer support to the Thomas Family and their daughter, Christi, in her battle against cancer. Please visit Christi's website at to learn more. There, you'll find journals, photos and a lots of other information about this amazing child and her family.

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Monday, September 10, 2007

A New Little Girl In Heaven

Thanks to fellow Angel Mom Jennifer for sharing this poem with me many months ago. Christi and Nathan are probably great friends by now! (PICTURE: Christi on top - at CHOP, July 2005 - about 30 minutes before we learned her cancer was again taking off.)

I would never tell Shayla this today, but it was exactly one year ago that she spent her final day with Christi and told her a final goodbye that evening. It's killing me knowing we are now starting year two and our time away from her is just going greater. (I really do try to tell myself that it just means our time until we are together again is just shorter with each day, it's really not working to make me feel better.) It was also one year ago this afternoon Christi was given the "Last Rights" by a Catholic priest, who so kindly came to CHOP when called. Christi was tired, but coherent. Shayne thought she ought to confess her sins, based on Catholic religion, but the priest said that was not necessary. She was also not able to take Holy Communion as normal, but great effort was made and I am convinced that would not prevent God from allowing her into Heaven. We later learned that Christi's death was also difficult for the priest. As the final days approach, I feel like there is a heavy weight on top of my chest. I find I'm actually feeling that it is hard to breath at times, as crazy as that may sound, weird!

A New Little Girl in Heaven

"Oh, what do you think the angels say?"
Said the children up in heaven,
"There's a dear little girl coming Home today,
She's almost ready to fly away
From the earth we used to live in;
Let us go and open the gates of pearl,
Open them wide for the new little girl,"
Said the children up in heaven!
"God wanted her here, where His little ones meet,"
Said the children up in heaven;
"She will play with us in the golden street!
She has grown too fair, she has grown too sweet
For the world we used to live in.
She needs the sunshine, this dear little girl,
That gilds this side of the gates of pearl,"
Said the children up in heaven!
"Far down on earth, do you hear them weep?"
Said the children up in heaven,
"For the dear little girl has gone to sleep;
The shadows fall and the night clouds sweep
O'er the earth we used to live in;
But we'll go and open the gates of pearl,
Oh, why do they weep for their dear little girl?"
Said the children up in heaven!
"Fly with her quickly, O' angels dear,"
Said the children up in heaven;
"See, she's coming! Look there! Look there!
At the jasper light on her sunny hair,
Where the veiling clouds are riven!
Ah, hush-hush-hush; all the swift wings furl!
For the King Himself at the gates of pearl
Is taking her hand, dear, sweet little girl,
And leading her into heaven!"

(author unknown)


At 10/9/07 8:28 AM, Blogger HeatherB said...

Thinking of you today sweet friends. May God hold you close and bring you peace.

With all my love and prayers,


At 10/9/07 10:04 AM, Blogger ann said...

Dear Angela,
I have read your blog daily since a couple months before your beautiful Christi passed away. I don't believe I've ever commented before, but I wanted to take the time today to let you know that your family is always in my prayers. I think of all of you often. You really have been an inspiration to me. Your strength through this nightmare is amazing. Your faith and love of family and friends shines through in your posts. I can't imagine how hard this time is for your family. I just wanted to know that I will continue praying for all of you and for your special angel.

At 10/9/07 11:56 AM, Blogger D.K. said...

The Bible says that the gift of Heaven lies in Jesus alone (John 3:16 and Ephesians 2: 8-10). Rest assured that if Christi knew Jesus she is resting in His presence now. Sounds like you are wonderful parents who taught her the importance of Him.

At 10/9/07 2:07 PM, Anonymous Caroline said...

what a sweet poem!! ohh i meant to tell you I was watching an older season of the show ER and one of the doctors used to work at chop! i always think of you when i watch it..and i don't think it being hard for you to breath is weird at all! its really really understandable
xoxo wishing you a great day,

At 10/9/07 4:35 PM, Blogger Lucky Charmz said...

Dear Thomas family,
I have read your blog for over a year and have never ever posted. I read your blog frequently and started reading it right before Christi's death. I read it frequently as your story unfolded and I have been drawn to your blog every since.
Angela, you and your husband have faced a deep challenge and I know you can survive this upcoming weeks and get through it. I am an elementary school teacher, I teach instrumental music (strings). I am surrounded by beautiful children and most days I hope I can give them the gift of music and help shape their lives in a positive way! I believe that children are a blessing and I hope to be a mother someday although at this time we are struggling with infertility.

I read your blog, no matter how tough sometimes to understand how this beautiful girl was taken from you and know that it is SO important to remember your blessings and that children are each so special and individual. You are a constant reminder of what it means to be humble and to have love. What it means to love and love others. The importance of family. the importance of photos to remember your memories. The importance of faith. So important.
I am very touched by your photo memories and your cheerfulness and sometimes humor! I am constantly amazed at your honesty even in the face of all you have been through. I know it must take great strength to go to school, among many other tasks, and I know it must be very tough. You are very very brave. I love seeing the old and new photos and know that this is an important part of your grief process.
I lost my best male friend from high school to leukemia. He died at age 21, we were both 21. He died shortly before he was to have a bone marrow transplant. His name was Tom Sheridan and I know that somewhere in heaven Christi and Tom have met and are probably riding a roller coaster or saving an cat. He was a camp counselor at Camp Good Times and Special Dyas here in the Syracuse area- when he was in remission he was a counselor for younger chuldren and the siblings of cancer survivors. Every day I think of how much of a blessing that he was to my life, even for a short time and how wrong it was that he was taken from us at such a young age. There are so many things I do not understand, even now. But I am grateful for my photos and I am constantly reminded of things about him that have shaped my life. And no, it's not fair.
God bless your family and may you have a good month. I'll be praying for your family.
Your friend in the blog world,
Allison Capano
Syracuse, NY

At 10/9/07 8:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Angela: Our God is a merciful and just God and I have no doubt that there is a special place in heaven reserved for children who have had to endure cancer on earth. Christi was a special gem...sweet and kind and loving to the very last breath. You gave her an outstanding gift on earth. Your faith and dedication God was passed on to Christi through her faith. Her belief in Christ made access to the speecial place in heaven possible.

God bless you, Shayne and Shayla as you enter an extremely hard week.


At 10/9/07 9:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just thinking of you. I know tomorrow is the anniversary of the diagnosis of the awful beast that took your beautiful little girl. I'm praying for you.
Sending extra hugs!
Megan in NC

At 10/9/07 10:31 PM, Blogger Olivia said...

What a beautiful poem. Here is another I thought you might like. I am thinking of you all and sending many loving hugs your way.


I’m An Angel Now

One night I cried to Jesus
As I sat beneath the tree;
I looked into the open sky
And hoped He'd answer me.

"I'm lost dear Lord ...
I've traveled far but still I seem to roam;
Please light the way and lead me, Lord,
I need to get back home."

I told him of my burdens
And of the sadness in my heart;
That from His gracious love
I'd never felt so far apart.

"Why did you take my child, Lord?
I cannot understand!
No longer can I touch her face
Or hold her tiny hand."

"I'm angry, Lord ... I'm missing her,
I'm drowning in my sorrow;
Please help to heal my yesterday
And face each new tomorrow."

It was then I heard her gentle voice
And felt her presence near;
How I wanted so to hold her
As I cried another tear.

She said "Mommy, I'm an angel now,
My spirit will be free;
I'm an angel now in heaven,
So please don't cry for me."

"I was chosen by our Lord above
And now I'm in His care;
Whenever you need me,
Just look inside your heart;
I promise to be there."

"No one can ever take away
Our bond with one another;
For I'll always be your precious child,
As you will always be my mother."

"So if you cannot find your way
Or the road to home seems far;
Just look up to the Heavens
And I'll be your guiding star."

She said, "Mommy, I'm an angel now,
My spirit will be free;
I'm an angel now in Heaven ...
There's no need to cry for me."

~ Author Unknown ~

At 11/9/07 2:22 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a precious poem, the words are simply perfect. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Looking at Christi no one could've ever guessed the horrible news the Thomas Team was about to recieve. She looks like a perfectly healthy child on the outside and her smile is shining bright. Ugh, I hate the horrible NB beast!

(It's past midnight.)

5 years ago today that nasty word NB creeped into your world and your lives were forever changed. Christi taught many life lessons along the way through out her 4 year battle and will forever continue to for many years to come. I only wish she could be teaching these lessons physically here on earth. Christi, you are forever loved and missed!

At 11/9/07 5:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Thomas Team

Today is 11 September and I vividly remember checking your website this day last year when Shayla flew home unaccompanied. My heart went out to you then and it continues to go out to you now. With thoughts and prayers from Australia. Good night, Michelle

At 19/9/07 6:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thinking of your sweet girl. Can't believe how time passes so quickly. The closer to being with her again in Heaven. God Bless your family.

Kristin, Plano, TX


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