Dread and Anxiety

All year the day has been behind us. Now it is before us, something we will have to make our way through again. I think that sums up why I am extremely anxious and fearful about September 19th approaching - yuck! Yesterday, I worked in my classroom. It just reminded me of last year, taking the girls with me and preparing for school. We were all so excited! Never would I have ever imagined how quickly things would go downhill. I wish my mind would let me forget everything that happened one year ago, but I find I'm waking up in a panic remembering the horror all over again.

In just a bit we will load up Grandma Nee Nee (and her cigarettes, cough, smile) and drive her to Toledo. With any luck her 1PM surgery will go off without a hitch. (And with any lucky while she's in surgery I can talk to someone about starting a smoking cessation program, or at least slap on a nicotine patch or something, hee hee!) She's ready, or so she says! I hope and pray all goes as well as possible and that she's discharged tonight or tomorrow. Shayne, who has been changing her open wounds every 12 hours, took a picture of her leg because he said one look and I'd be passed out on the floor but he thinks I'll be able to look at a photo of it instead. Because her leg was swelling so fast when they brought her to Toledo via ambulance, they had to put her out at the bedside and then slice both sides of her leg to relieve pressure so that she wouldn't lose it. I think perhaps that has been more painful and has caused more problems than the two broken leg bones themselves. Regardless, Shayla and I made three different kinds of cookies for Nee Nee to take to the nurses for taking such good care of her last time. Our family knows, of course, that nurses (just like the countless volunteers we've met) are true Angels from Heaven! May they one day be richly blessed!

I remember the night Grandma Nee Nee came over and brought the girls Avon's matching raincoats and umbrellas. They had so much fun pretending it was raining in the kitchen. Today I noticed that Christi only had ONE sock on. How I wish she were sitting on my lap because I know she's really be giggling about that and predicting what she did with the other one, what a hoot! I miss that little giggly one! I hope you look down over Nee Nee today and if you see anything funny happen that you laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh, my little sweetpea!